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Of all those affected by the ending of a marriage and the division of a family, divorce lawyers find that it is frequently the children who can suffer the most unless parents can co-exist.
To raise happy and healthy children even after a divorce, parents must be able to put their own feelings toward each other aside and do what is best for their children.
Sometimes when this does not happen and one or both parents continue to exhibit extreme animosity toward the other, the children end up taking the brunt of it.
Called “malicious parent syndrome,” it is a damaging situation that divorce attorneys see more often than they would like to.
What Is Malicious Parent Syndrome?
Malicious parent syndrome is when one parent becomes extremely hateful against the other parent after a divorce in ways that negatively affect the whole family.
Though divorce lawyers see it happening more frequently with non-custodial parents acting out against custodial parents, this is not always the case.
Attorneys see it happening more with mothers, although fathers exhibit these behaviors as well.
The issue could have to do with custody or simply that the other parent filed for divorce.
Regardless of the reason, it results in a damaging situation where one parent tries to use the child or children as leverage against the other parent or simply to retaliate against them.
How Are Kids Of Divorce Used By Malicious Parents?
When a parent’s anger over a divorce or custody situation turns into malicious parent syndrome, divorce lawyers usually see it appearing in a few recognizable ways:
- Lying to Children - The affected parent lies to the children about the other parent to make them believe untrue things and create doubt in their relationship with that parent. They may lie to others as well and break laws to uphold these lies.
- Preventing Contact - The affected parent denies visitation, refuses to communicate, leaves the other parent out of the child’s extracurricular activities, attempts to leave them out of important co-parenting decisions, and more.
- Alienation - The affected parent makes efforts to alienate children from the other parent to the point of wanting to go to court to change the co-parenting decision and gain sole custody.
Parents displaying these and associated behaviors who are not diagnosed with some other mental disorder that could be responsible for such actions are said to be exhibiting malicious parent syndrome.
How Does Malicious Parent Syndrome Affect Children?
Divorce attorneys know that children of divorce are especially vulnerable to the pain that this situation can bring.
They may feel scared due to changing family situations, be anxious, and wonder whether they are still loved, all of which can negatively affect them.
Kids will naturally believe their parents, so when one parent tells them bad things about the other one, prevents them from seeing that parent, or otherwise convinces them that there is something wrong with the other parent, it can quickly break down important parental bonds.
Research on divorce and co-parenting has proven that those raised through positive co-parenting develop into happy, well-adjusted children much as if the family unit was still intact.
In situations where the parents cannot get along, or there is maliciousness involved, children can end up actually disliking the other parent unjustly and develop other emotional problems.
What Should Parents Do If Their Ex Acts Maliciously?
Parents who believe their ex is displaying maliciousness toward them at the expense of their children should speak to a divorce lawyer about it right away.
Simply backing down in an attempt to reduce the stress on the children is not going to help the situation, since kids need a healthy relationship with both of their parents.
Discuss the situation with an experienced divorce attorney who can help you hold a malicious parent accountable for their destructive actions and seek the court’s assistance to uphold custody decisions if necessary.
